The year 2020 is the year of pandemic, of cancellations, of disappointment, of struggle and stress, of hustling to make a buck. It’s been tough and exhausting for myself and my collaborators. But, in a strange way, it’s been healing, this time of slowing down, of stopping, of breathing and becoming more aware of how fragile our system really is during these surreal times. I learned how to slow down.
I walk a lot more these days and I learned to enjoy the silence and strange tranquility. The wind through the leaves on the trees outside my patio, the different cycles of birds that flew about the skies as we transitioned from cold, endless winter to spring buds and leaves then finally flowers. I re-learned the little things, putting down tobacco and making food offerings in the mornings to N’shaytkin, those that came before us. These little ceremonies have grounded me back to the earth while opening up the sky a little bit more.
Re-learning, re-membering, I’ve found peace watching the clouds pass and the heat waves arrive baking the land and I kept walking. My body has been healing this year, all the little maladies that compile on us because we were driven by that pounding drum, HARDER! FASTER! MORE! Of failed capitalism. It’s no longer booming in my ears, in my skull, in my heart. My practice is finally returning little by little, a mural here, a song there, a story opens up and I am able to grasp it out of the sky and write it down.
I look forward to seeing my friends, my collaborators and seeing what we create as we’re a little calmer, a little wiser and more in tune than we might have been before this pandemic. That is where I want to be. At the gates before the race, the fall from the plane skydiving, rolling in the wind, the splash in the water during cliff diving and those tense, few minutes before walking onto a stage of people waiting to see you.
Chris Bose is a writer, multi-disciplinary artist, musician, curator and filmmaker. His newest book is N’shaytkin, a novella that in collaboration with David Mcintosh of Battery Opera was turned into a performance and music experience in December 2019. 2020 saw the performance and music being refined for festivals and touring, then the pandemic hit and shut things down. He is of the Secwepemc and Nlaka’pamux Nation in BC, and currently spends his time in Kamloops B.C.
